Friday, May 1, 2009

moody mooday

i'm moody. i think it's that TOM - or will be soon. i've been cranky to everyone, and i really shouldn't be. plus, i'm tired.

okay, so i haven't been journaling. i feel like i'm not doing well, though i'm not necessarily eating bad, i just can't say with certainty that i've been in points, because i haven't journaled a single thing. i've stuck to healthy choices (except on wednesday, when i ate PF Chang's with the boys - i KNOW that food is high points - though i didn't eat my entire dish, which helped), got my water in, and exercised daily. i even took walks on my lunch in addition to working out in the evenings.

i've been so pissed off at my mom this week, too. :( had a bit of a breakdown about it last night. it makes me so mad that she won't be at my wedding. oh, sorry, daughter - my pain pills are more important than your future. grrrr. i think i'm just a little sad that she won't be there - to see me happy, and to be proud of me. a lot of days i just want to know that she'd be proud of where/how i have ended up. and i feel like i can't do a unity candle at the wedding because i don't have a "mom" to light my half before the ceremony. which is fine - because really, i hate when they blow out, and it probably would because it's an outdoor ceremony. but still.

i am beyond stressed with everything going on. a lot of big changes are taking place, and while i'm happy about all of them, it's a tad overwhelming. trying to find a job, daniel starting a new job, him moving to MD, me hopefully moving to MD soon, planning the wedding, getting married, finding him a place to live until i can move, paying two rents, etc, etc, etc.

i know, i know - i'm whining about things that i have been wanting. i think jill said it best when she said "it's okay to whine about this. so what if you're whining over things you wanted? you never said you wanted it all at the same time!" haha.

that being said, i'm extremely thankful that daniel got placed in MD...and that, even if i don't find a job up that way in the immediate future, we will still get lots of together time, because cumberland is a short drive away from charleston...and weekend trips will be much more doable.

i guess all of this stress has lead to the lack of journaling. i don't want to lose control over the weight loss, too. i've come too far.

i will face the scale this weekend, and hopefully still have a loss to report. with or without the loss, my goals for next week are:
  1. exercise daily
  2. stay within my points target and weeklies
  3. journal my points
  4. work on wedding plans
  5. finish gathering addresses for my invitations
okay, enough rambling from me. sorry for the moody post. here's to a better weekend!


  1. Your mom would be very proud of where you are and who you are! I can't imagine how you feel with her not being there but you should never doubt that she would be beaming with pride at your accomplishments!

    As for your goals, you can totally do it and me and D will be there to help! Everything will work out :-)

  2. I'm tired too :(

    *hugs* Sorry to hear you're so stressed missus. Things will sort themselves out soon I am sure :)

    "i don't want to lose control over the weight loss, too. i've come too far" I said that to myself just now. And about blogging too. I keep slacking.